now i understand that the closest i have ever god in the back of an ambulance怎么翻译呢?

应该是now i understand that the closest i have ever got is in the back of an ambulance吧？
我现在明白了，我最靠近的就是救护车背后。

现在我才知道,我曾经最视为上帝的人,现在就在救护车的后部.

现在我明白,最接近我从没上帝在后面的一辆救护车

god? 也许是 got？