有没有高手能够把这个句子翻译成英文啊？！！

楼主看看下面翻译的怎么样？
I hate living in the big city, I want to move to a place to live where the birds not to defecate .

I hate living in the big cities, I would like to do a local bird life was not Lashi

I hate living in big cities. I want to find a place to live where even birds never shit there.

it sucks for me(这个词很口语……但是国外的人经常这么说，恶心，很讨厌的意思) to live in a city! I really want to move to a barren land.(直译鸟不拉屎不行吧~中英文有时候不能直译的……不然很诡异哒~~barren是荒地；瘠地的意思，不满意后面加barren land without anyone else)