托福作文 帮忙看一下 独立写作

来源：百度知道 编辑：UC知道 时间：2024/05/15 12:53:26
“ Experience is the best teacher”is an old chiche, but I agree with it. Some people might think that the knowledge gained from the books is more professional .However, in my view, I think that knowledge gained from the books is more impressive, more practical and more useful.
We can get much more professional information from the books. The author can provide us the specific information in a certain field of study. By studying from these books, we can raise our knowledge greatly and develop our intelligence at the same time. On the other hand, we also can increase our knowledge from experience. Only by experience something can you remember this thing much deeper. Like we study and take the exam. Only you have taken the exam and have analyzed the wrong answers can you correct the false answers the next time. In a word, it’s more impressive after having doing it yourself.
Furthermore, it is a fact that you can get much more information from the books because you ca

说句实话，我看了一段就看不下去了，实在不怎么样。第一句话我知道你想表达什么，可是实在不怎么样。你完全可以用一个复合句来表达。还有，粗略的浏览，你一会说来自书本好，一会来自经验好，这就表明至少在这篇作文里你的观点混乱不清，这种话题作文你记住一定要表示清楚观点，还要强调突出，别给人摸棱两可的感觉。gained完全没必要用，太汉是英语了。你不要总是用些I think，some people think这类的，太龌龊啦。你应该多用些复杂点的语法和词汇，还有连接词要灵活运用。

我没考过托福，只考过雅思，可是我觉得这作文的水平也就是四级里的一般吧，看来你还有很长的路要走，努力，多看看人家高手是怎么写的，多背些高水平的句子，文章，只有积累的多了，才能写出好作文。