校园英语幽默小品，要贴近生活

泰国人

焦仲卿johnny(jforshort)
刘兰芝lunch(lforshort)
焦母johnny’s mother(jmforshort)
刘母lunch’s mother(lmforshort)
太守之子mayor’sson(msforshort)
强盗burglars(abandc)

prologue 序幕

(j作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,j被打中,狼狈不堪)
j:everybody says that i’m hen pecked, but in fact,i’m a strong tiger,(小声)while my
wife is wusong.
译：人人都说我怕老婆，实际上我是老虎，（小声）我妻子是武松。

(指着上台处的门大声道)i’m not afraid of you!
译：我才不怕你呢！

(内砸出一脸盆,j接住当成盾牌护着头)then, i’m afraid of whom! my wife lunchi is the most famous woman in the neighbor-hood.she is braver than me,smarter than me and stronger than me .all this i donot care. i only want she to be tender than me. but she is not! having a wife like this is just like living in the hell!
译：谁怕谁啊！在邻里中，我妻子是最有名气的。她比我勇敢、比我聪明、比我强壮。我也不在乎这些。我只觉得她该对我温柔些，但是她却不懂温柔！有这样的太太就像活在地狱中啊！

(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中j)
my god! who can help me?(下)
译：我的天！谁来救救我啊？

act1 第一幕
(序幕结束时,jm作窃听状)
jm(拄拐棍