帮忙批一下6级的作文，高分相送，混分瞎写的滚

来源：百度知道 编辑：UC知道 时间：2024/05/17 06:20:10
要求：1。大学生的心里健康很重要
2.采取什么手段使大学生的心里健康更强
3.我们应该怎么做

这个也就是上次考6级的作文，练习一下，最好是有批作文经验的老师，帮忙批一下，在此谢过了

There is no doubt that the university students’ mental health is very important. For one thing, it impacts the attitude of the students’ to the life. If the attitude is navigate, it may courage students do harm activities to society, at least it wouldn’t instruct them to bring profit to the society. All in all, we should enhance our conscious to cultivate the students’ mental health.
Therefore, the schools are supposed to reinforce the education about the student mental health. Somebody advise that the mental health should go into class. The systemic instruction is very helpful to improve mental health. And people also say that the student in the college should take part in some activities properly communication with the others not only open our mind but also release our grief.
As for us, it is sure to look after ourselves well. We s

哎···
这位同学 随便才看了2个句子 问题就不少
（1）impact on 固定短语，it impacts the attitude of the students’ to the life， attitude of the students’ 都用了of了，怎么还是students’ ?应该改成students,或则the students' attitude... to the life要么on life或则towards life
（2） If the attitude is navigate。navigate 单词错了
（3） it may courage students do harm activities to society，这个句子不简单，一个句子9个单词，错的还不少~~~囧 拜托 courage 是名词 ，encourage 才对嘛。。。，而且也应该是encourage sb to do sth这个搭配才对嘛... do harm activities,暂不说activities用的适合不适合，这个harm在这应该是形容词吧，同学，是不是应该改成harmful呢？给你改成it may lead students to do something harmful to the society. encourage 一般指鼓励做积极的，好的事 lead to do sth 导致做什么，导致发生什么
bring profit to the society，profit 用在这里不对，至少应该用benefits，因为profit主要是用在商业中指的是收入扣除了成本后的利润（注意，是专门指收入扣除了成本后的利润），而benefit涵盖的较广，可以指示其它的，这2个单词在商务英语里面有专门的解释.

我觉得已经没在看下去的必要了 你的问题是单词不熟悉，而且还不熟悉词性 语法很成问题 可能还有点粗心大意 先把单词背准确了在说其他的
改卷老师一看你那错误单词 最基本的都这样 还能给你几分？
如果满分是100，你这个大概30到40···

建议你找你们老师给你好好改改 在好好的辅导下
你这基础