UC知道请老师点评下我写的英语作文！谢谢！
来源：百度知道 编辑：UC知道 时间：2024/05/16 06:25:19
请根据以下内容，写一封回信。
Dear Editor:
I'm a new student at Haining Hongda Senior High School.My home is far from Haining,so I must live at school.This is the first time for me to get away from my parents.I feel very sad.When I left home,I could not help tearing myself away from them.I do not want to be alone at school,and I am a shy girl.I have been crying in bed at night these days.I want to stay at home forever.I miss my parents very much.Could you tell me what to do?
Your early reply is expected.
Regards
Amy
回信应包括如下要点：1.鼓励Amy求学信心，志存高远，四海为家。
2.就Amy的目前状况，提两到三个建议。
正文：
Dear Amy,
Thank you for your letter. I am so glad to have a talk about your present situation with you.(开头以给出.)
It is vital that you should be equipped with confidence to study. Do you still remember the old saying that “Where there is a will, there is a way ”? Please pursue your dream and consider it a home wherev
Dear Editor:
I'm a new student at Haining Hongda Senior High School.My home is far from Haining,so I must live at school.This is the first time for me to get away from my parents.I feel very sad.When I left home,I could not help tearing myself away from them.I do not want to be alone at school,and I am a shy girl.I have been crying in bed at night these days.I want to stay at home forever.I miss my parents very much.Could you tell me what to do?
Your early reply is expected.
Regards
Amy
回信应包括如下要点：1.鼓励Amy求学信心，志存高远，四海为家。
2.就Amy的目前状况，提两到三个建议。
正文：
Dear Amy,
Thank you for your letter. I am so glad to have a talk about your present situation with you.(开头以给出.)
It is vital that you should be equipped with confidence to study. Do you still remember the old saying that “Where there is a will, there is a way ”? Please pursue your dream and consider it a home wherev
It is evident that the family to our lives is what the water to the fish.
Secondly, why don’t you call your parents regularly?
以上两句欠妥，这是我修改后的版本。
这样的作文在不考虑书写的前提下，如果25分，我给20。
whbrian 首先谢谢你的修改。
但我想说 你的第一句修改有点问题。你所说的“It is evident that the family to our lives is what the water to the fish.”
我不知道有没有错，但是我所用的那个用法是绝对没有错的。
A is to B what the C is to D。
还有专问歌词者， Thank you for your letter是题目中给的，不是我写的。我是续接而已。
22分也还够了。谢谢哈。
不好
Thank you for your letter???
你帮她解答哎,如果你说是有礼貌,那就算了
上面的whbrain说的很好
如果你是初三,我给25分,高三嘛,顶死22
写得还可以，我觉得这篇文章应属于一等文，可得23-25分