大虾们帮个忙呀，帮我看下作文，打个评语

来源：百度知道 编辑：UC知道 时间：2024/06/01 04:32:53
like most people, i like watching TV. i remembered i started to love watching TV as soon as my father brought a tv when i was very young. there are really a great magic in TV. almost time, tv can give me my favorite. being a child, i was fond of cartons. being a teenager, i was keen on TV shows and entertament news. now, as a college student, i am caring for news all over the world and some movies also attract me very much. gererally speaking, TVgives me all kinds of useful imformation and make my life more enjoyful. what's more, i can experience a lot and move much though watching TV. though today more and more media are spreading in our daily life, TV helps me kill my spare time and make my life colourful, companying with me a life-ling time.
感觉写的很差，请各位大虾写个评吧

首先，第七行开头应该是generally speaking
另外要注意你的大小写。
最后一句话改成and companies with me all my life会好些。
简单句太多，而且有点流水账的感觉。你要写电视，那么可以深层次的说明为什么喜欢它，而不是从小到大的描述。比如电视有几点优点：可以得知新闻、可以欣赏艺术和音乐、可以看世界风光、可以看到自然常识、可以消遣时间等等。

good

简单句比较多
写得比较谨慎
SO 感觉不流畅
应该参与真正的英语口语交流
有亲身体会才会另有感受该把英语学活了,不只是写,而是说话的流畅
加油