UC知道我这篇文章..能拿多少分? pART 1(也看PART 2)
来源：百度知道 编辑：UC知道 时间：2024/06/10 22:19:46
请问这篇文章几年纪的学生能学得出来啊?
能拿多少分?
对刚满14岁的学生来说..
是好还是不好啊??
A Story About U And A Dog [Part 1]
One day!
U was delivering newspaper and flyer to each house~!
When U was standing in front of the door of house 110 Metcalf Ave~
U remember last time when she put the flyer into the mail box in the back yard of that house~
when U wants to leave the back yard~
Suddenly, a dog ran out from the very back of the back yard~
U was so scared~
While she was screaming, she ran away from the back yard and closed the back yard door when she just got out~
But the dog was still barking~
Btw!
the dog is kinda small~ a fat little doggy~
So this time U won't go into the back yard of house 110 again~
U saw the fence door wasn't close perfectly~
So she try to close it~
The door was kinda better~
So she put the flyer on the top of the fence~(beween the door and the fence)
(so like the door is on t
能拿多少分?
对刚满14岁的学生来说..
是好还是不好啊??
A Story About U And A Dog [Part 1]
One day!
U was delivering newspaper and flyer to each house~!
When U was standing in front of the door of house 110 Metcalf Ave~
U remember last time when she put the flyer into the mail box in the back yard of that house~
when U wants to leave the back yard~
Suddenly, a dog ran out from the very back of the back yard~
U was so scared~
While she was screaming, she ran away from the back yard and closed the back yard door when she just got out~
But the dog was still barking~
Btw!
the dog is kinda small~ a fat little doggy~
So this time U won't go into the back yard of house 110 again~
U saw the fence door wasn't close perfectly~
So she try to close it~
The door was kinda better~
So she put the flyer on the top of the fence~(beween the door and the fence)
(so like the door is on t
我觉得一个14岁的学生写成这样确实不错，我14岁的时候还完全不会写复合句，你已经很不错了。
不过正因为如此，你的复合句也暴露出许多问题，可能是因为你对它还不能熟悉运用。多背写句子应该就会好些。还有你的时态，不知道你自己发现没——混乱，一下子现在时，一下子过去时。作为一篇初中作文我觉得100分可以打85分。因为你有用到复合句，还有一些比较好的词汇，但如果时态方面处理好了，可以打90.
还有一个小问题有的单词用的不太妥。比如说U saw the fence door wasn't close perfectly~ 。perfectly是完美的意思，没人会用完美形容门是否关的紧。你可以考虑用the fence door is not tightly closed。
就这些，我就是喜欢做改错这类事，希望你不介意，呵呵。
首先，用第二人称来写文章不是很舒服阿。其次，你的句式过于平淡，建议多换换，使文章更添生机。不过，一个14岁的孩子能写这么长的文章，还是不错了。加油吧！
14岁也就是初中的学生，初中如果不是专门的英语学校，这样的英语是出类拔萃的。里面涉及到的一些词和语法，是我高中的时候才接触到的。。很厉害。