急需一篇1分钟英语演讲短文 （搞笑一点的）

我建议你去看看新概念2的课本，那里的课文很简单，大概也就一分钟
但是句式，语法都很经典，而且比较实用
也比较搞笑，我推荐第48课，do you want to tell me something?
讲的是拔错牙的故事
在百度上一搜新概念2第48课就有课文
我就不粘贴复制了
PS：完全手大，仿冒必究
好吧
And it was always seldom scrooge that he knew how to keep Christmas well. If any man alive possess knowledge. May that be truly said of us and all of us. And so is Tiny Tim observed God blesses us everyone. And so ends Dickens' masterpiece The Christmas Coral.
Wait a minute, that so the end was a graunchy?
Yeah. Isn't it great book to show up now and take everything?
How come it's called the Christmas Carol anyway?
Yeah, there's nobody in this story named Carol.
Miss Laurance, would please change places with Mr Matthews?
All right, I am a hyperactive, underachieving 11-year-old boy.
I meant physically.
Oh, that takes lesson exactly like a talk.
Why do I have to move?
We were just giving our view of the book.
Yeah, I mean yo