求下面这篇笑话的英文翻译

To have a new staff, wrong number phone to him, general manager of office, he did not know, offended the general manager, general manager angrily question: Do you know who I am? I was general manager of the company!
So the staff asked: Do you know who I am么? Other answer do not know, "good." Staff to hang up the phone.

Peter joined the army when he was eighteen, and for several months he was taught how to be a good soldier. He did quite well in everything except shooting. One day he and his friends were practicing their shooting, and all of them were doing quite well except Peter. After he had shot at the target nine times and had not hit it once, the officer who was trying to teach the young soldiers to shoot said, "You're quite hopeless, Peter! Don't waste your last bullet too! Go behind that wall and shoot yourself with it!"

Peter felt ashamed. He went behind the wall, and a few seconds later the officer and the other young sold