请高手用英文帮我翻译这个笑话，（追加200）

The final after examination, xiao Ming returned home to parents said: "mom, dad, I two old 100 points." After hearing parents very happy. Small clear say: "are two doors up 100 points." My dad is very angry, and listen to raise, mom told: "calculate mathematical 40 points, language should be 60 points, at least a pass?" At this moment, xiao Ming whispered, "mom, is not the sort algorithm is language! 10 minutes, mathematics, add together is 100 points."

After the final exam, Xiao Ming went home and told his parents :"Mum, Dad, this time I got two 100." His parents were very happy . But Xiao Ming said again," Not each one, but plus the two." His dad was very angry to hear this, and wanted to gave him a good beat. But his mum said :"If the mathe was 40, then the Chinese would be 60. He could pass one subject at least." At this moment, Xiao Ming wispeared,"Mum, it's not that kind of caculation. It'