帮我检查一下英语作文有什么语法错误的地方。

While we walking around in the shop这个应该改为When we were walking aroud the shop.
the salesgirl could't hear English at all.前面加个and the salesgirl couldn't understand English at all
I knew it's 改成I knew it was
, my mother also praised me that I gave a hand to the foreigner.这句重起一句，My mothe also praised me fot giving a hand to the foreigner

This afternoon， I went shopping with my mom.While we were walking around in the shop, I saw a foreigner in men's department. He wanted to buy a pair of shoes, but he couldn't talk to the salesgirl, because he couldn't speak Chinese, the salesgirl could't understand English at all. I knew it was very difficult for the foreigner to buy himself shoes like that, so I translated for them .At last, the foreigner bought himself shoes and said thanks to me , my mother also praised me that I had given a hand to the foreigner. So I felt very happy.

还行，继续努力

This affternoon, I went shopping with my