UC知道帮忙修改一下雅思作文，看看这篇能得几分。
来源：百度知道 编辑：UC知道 时间：2024/05/19 15:16:53
No Smoking in All Public Place
One of the hot issue which many people complain about today is smoking in publice places such as bus,subway,and department stores. In spite of that,there are still some people smoking cigarettes in sight of ‘NO SMOKING’through the notices have been placed obviously in these situation.For this ,many countries and areas have prohibitd smoking in all of the public places by legislation.I believe that this is a good ideal to forbid it.
The first and formost,we have known,smoking can lead to a large number of diseases,for example lung cancer, tracheitis. Even so,for the smoker,nothing seems more difficult and painful than giving up the hamful habit.Because them depend psychologically on cigarettes,whenever they feel nervous,excited,sad or happy,they turn to smoking by instinct.in additionly,some smokers who smoke in public places are of loose morals.Those people seldom think of the damage that their smoking harm to the helth of nearby non
One of the hot issue which many people complain about today is smoking in publice places such as bus,subway,and department stores. In spite of that,there are still some people smoking cigarettes in sight of ‘NO SMOKING’through the notices have been placed obviously in these situation.For this ,many countries and areas have prohibitd smoking in all of the public places by legislation.I believe that this is a good ideal to forbid it.
The first and formost,we have known,smoking can lead to a large number of diseases,for example lung cancer, tracheitis. Even so,for the smoker,nothing seems more difficult and painful than giving up the hamful habit.Because them depend psychologically on cigarettes,whenever they feel nervous,excited,sad or happy,they turn to smoking by instinct.in additionly,some smokers who smoke in public places are of loose morals.Those people seldom think of the damage that their smoking harm to the helth of nearby non
1：In spite of that,there are still some people smoking cigarettes in sight of ‘NO SMOKING’signs placed in obvious places.
2: 你有点罗嗦，重复的太多
3：don't put "in" in front of "additionaly", just put "additionaly"
4: 语法和用词有的地方还是中式英语
得好好改改阿，大致来说还行